Just When I Thought I Would Crumble…

Just When I Thought I Would Crumble…

The hedge of protection had been removed; suddenly I was vulnerable like Job. The enemy started to beat me until my heart cracked. I cried out to God to patch the cracks, but I received no answer. I trusted in Him, asked for Him to stay with me through it, not knowing His plan; and continued on.

Soon, I was under fire. The fiery darts of the enemy pierced me, leaving holes in my soul. I cried out to God to patch the holes, but He did not reply. I wondered if this was His plan or was the enemy trying to have his way? I fought in His name and prayed, but also trusted in Him.

The voice of the enemy came and tore my mind to shreds, trying to get me to question everything. What is from God? What is not? How do I discern? I study the Bible and ask for His wisdom, and trust in Him.

All of the other things coming at me began to affect my strength. I became weak. I asked Him to please protect my spirit from harm. It was weak from my cracked heart, holey soul, shredded forlorn mind, and lack of strength. My faith wanted to remain strong, but it saw its own weakness, and I prayed for Him to help my unbelief.

Finally, when I thought I would crumble, I heard this: 

“Now that your heart is cracked, My Light can shine through you and reach others. It is not to be kept under a bushel, nor hidden within a heart.”

“Now that you have been pierced, My Holy Spirit can flow out of your soul much easier. No longer will you have to overflow; I can flow through you freely.”

“Now that you are questioning everything, I can use that to help you learn more about Me and draw you closer to Myself. Before, you thought pridefully that you knew much – how you knew some things but did not know them! – but in asking Me for wisdom and reading My Word, your pride is crumbling like the walls of Jericho and you can see what I say and not what people say.”

Image Credit: Me

“Now that your spirit is weak, you may find true strength in Me. For when you are weak, you are actually strong! Before, you relied on yourself, but now you have nothing left and must turn to Me for your source of strength.”

“Your humbleness to My plans has made it possible to create an outflow of My love through your damaged heart and soul. You gave them to Me to do what I will with it, and I did. What the enemy meant for evil, I will turn for good. Continue, my faithful servant, loving Me with all of your cracked heart, pierced soul, wondering mind, and weak spirit, and I will be with you every step. The road won’t be easy – you may crack even more, be pierced again, question everything you once believed about Me, and find that you are too weak to serve Me. But that is how I need you so that I can use you. Do you trust Me?

Image Credit: Quino Al via unsplash

And then, despite the state my heart, soul, mind, and spirit was in, I felt peace.

“I trust You, my Lord.”


“No one, when he has lit a lamp, puts it in a secret place or under a basket, but on a lampstand, that those who come in may see the light.” (Luke 11:33 NKJV)

Jesus said to him, “You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.” (Matthew 22:37 NKJV)

But He gives more grace. Therefore He says: “God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble…” James 4:6

“But as for you, you meant evil against me; but God meant it for good…” Genesis 50:20

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. (Romans 8:28 KJV)

And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ’s sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong. (Second Corinthians 12:8-9 NKJV)

This is a little something I wrote a few months ago after praying about a rough patch I was going through. 🙂 I hope it can also bring hope to others. ❤

The Light Of The World Award

Thank you to T. R. Noble for nominating me for this award! ❤ I’m so honored! And sorry it took me a while to get to this – I’m behind again, haha. I look forward to catching up with everyone. ❤

The Apostle Paul said, “Pay everyone what is owed: taxes to whom taxes are due, revenue to whom revenue is due, respect to whom respect is due, honor to whom honor is due.” (Romans 13:7). I believe that true believers and followers of Jesus Christ are actually like lighthouses for God. For this reason and because Jesus himself said that we are the “light of the world,” I decided to create The Light of The World Award to honor authors (bloggers) whose presence on the web serve as a shining light for Christ and His Gospel of salvation. If you have been nominated to receive this award and chose to accept it, here is what you need to do.

The Rules

  1. Save and add one of the award images (pictured above) on your blog.
  2. Create a page/post to mention the award nomination and thank the person/blog that nominated you. Make sure you provide a link to their site.
  3. Give credit to the creator of the award (Lighthouse Devotions) and provide a link to the site as well.  (http://www.Lighthousedevotions.blog)
  4. List the rules.
  5. Answer the next four questions on the same post:
    1. What three words would you use to describe your blog?
    2. In what way(s) can a Christian shine for Christ?
    3. What bible verse (quote it) talks about being a light in a dark and lost world?
    4. What Christian song do you know that has the word “light” in it? Provide a link if available.
  6. Nominate 7 or more people/blogs to receive the award. Briefly explain why you think they should receive it and provide a link to their sites.
  7. Contact them and let them know that you nominated them.
  8. Provide them with a link to the Rules page.
  9. Say a prayer thanking God for His light and ask that He continue to shine it through you and your blog.
  10. Keep shining the light of Christ wherever you go and in whatever you do!

“You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. – Matthew 5:14 (NAS)

  1. What three words would you use to describe your blog?
    • Jesus, Poetry, Nature
  2. In what way(s) can a Christian shine for Christ?
    • Therefore, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God. (First Corinthians 10:31 NKJV)
  3. What bible verse (quote it) talks about being a light in a dark and lost world?
    • You are all sons of light and sons of the day. We are not of the night nor of darkness. (First Thessalonians 5:5 NKJV)
  4. What Christian song do you know that has the word “light” in it? Provide a link if available.
    • I hope that “lighthouse” works. XD It has light in the word “lighthouse.” 🙂

Nominees and why I picked them:

The nominees are below, and the reason is the same for each of them – as far as I know, they have not been nominated for this award yet, and they brighten my Reader with each post they publish. ❤

Faye

Melani

Dreamer’s Outlet

Cavelle 

Lisa Beth

Sharon

Linda

Carly

Natalie

Diana

Leigh

Tammy (I know that you don’t plan to post for the month of June and that you are behind in getting to award and tags, so no pressure, haha. 😊)

Wish Into Prayer

Image Credit: Pixabay

Wish Into Prayer

“Starlight, star bright,.
First star I see tonight,.
I wish I may, I wish I might,.
Have this wish I wish tonight…”

Science tells us that all the stars
That we see are likely already dead
Does this mean that our wishes are
Dead as well, better left unsaid?

As I ponder this question
I notice something about the star
That I had been wishing on –
It was actually a planet named Mars.

Image Credit: Pixabay

I didn’t want to repeat myself to a ball of gas
And “planet bright planet might” just wasn’t the same
So I pulled the curtains over the window glass
And decided to sleep with the wish still in my brain.

If only I had a magic lamp like Aladdin
Maybe my wish could come true
But my lamp is electric and plugs in
And emits a soft hue…

I contemplate rubbing the lamp
But I know that it won’t work
Not because it says “Made in China” on the stamp
Or because the genie is a jerk

Image credit: Pixabay

But because I’m practical
And genies don’t exist. I stare at the ceiling
And count the shadows on the wall.
Boy, I hate this feeling.

The jumble of words
Keeps me awake in bed
But then I remember there is One who heard
So I made the wish into a prayer instead.

“You are not dead like the stars
And Your Light still shines bright;
I will instead rest in the fact that You are
Listening to my prayers tonight…”

 


I wrote the first draft of this during FAWM (February Album Writing Month) and later added to it and edited it. It’s a crazy one; I hope you all get a kick out of it. 🙂

The Light & A Life Update

Image credit: Pixabay

Have you heard the phrase, “light at the end of the tunnel?” I recently read this one: “Due to extenuating circumstances, the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off.” At first, I thought that this was clever – and it is – however, I realize with depression, it can certainly feel that way sometimes.

The enemy puts a blindfold on to block the view, and it takes a lot of effort to get it off.

Image credit: Pixabay

For anxiety sufferers, the tunnel constricts our view of the Light as the airway constricts when a person has an asthma attack. Nothing can get in, and nothing can make us feel more helpless and alone.

But maybe, just maybe, tunnel vision causes this. Thoughts have a way of blocking the Light and making it seem smaller than it is or telling us that the Light at the end of the tunnel is a train that’s going to run us over. It’s sometimes nearly impossible to control them.

image credit: Pixabay

It’s all lies. Yes, that is our view of things. But, whatever the case may be, just because I can’t see the Light, doesn’t mean that it isn’t there. For we walk by faith, not by sight (Second Corinthians 5:7).

So even when we feel hopeless in the middle of some tunnel where it’s dark, and where sometimes we’re even afraid of the Light, we know we must keep walking. Even when the tunnel starts to constrict, keep pushing forward. Even when the Light isn’t visible anymore, keep going. And when it looks like the Light might just run us over – keep on. Wield the Armor of the Spirit and order those lies away.

Image credit: Pixabay

For the Light is waiting to shine on us, and shine through us. Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on an hill cannot be hid. Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light unto all that are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven” (Matthew 5:14-16).


That’s pretty much where my brain has been today. It has been hard to stay focused on the Light and Who He is. If you read this post from a couple of weeks ago, then you know that life has been hard for me this month.

You may remember this photo from the past. Radar is the one on the left, washing her face. Last night, she became violently ill – and the vet isn’t open that late, so I had to wait until morning. I kept checking on her most of the night. When I checked on her around 1AM, she was already gone. I had no chance to even try to help her, it happened so fast. Here is another photo; she is on the left (and Sketcher is on the right):

Her eyes weren’t always different like that. When she was a kitten, another cat scratched her eye, and she became blind in that eye. She adapted so well, but I always had to keep that in mind because if I approached her on her blind side and then reached to pet her, she would lose her mind because she didn’t see it coming. 😅 I have many fond memories of her losing her mind. Most of the time it happened because I mistook her for Rabbit (Radar’s mother). Without seeing the face, they looked almost identical.

Now they are both gone, within a couple of weeks of each other.

Radar would have been eight this spring.

I may not be as active online the next few days while I try to put my heart back together. Love you guys! ❤

Out Of The Darkness

This is my first time participating in The Weekend Writing Prompt. 🙂 (Thank you to Miriam over at The Shower of Blessings for introducing me to it!) Just so happens, I was writing this poem anyway and it fits the prompt. (The challenge actually helped me finish it, so thank you, Sammi! 😁 Sorry I’m a bit late with posting it though.)

I’m doing the poetry challenge:

Poetry Challenge – Write a poem of no more than 15 lines about “Light and Dark”, that repeats at least two lines of the poem.

The first two lines of the first stanza repeats in the last stanza. 🙂

Out of the darkness and into the Light,
After the dusk, it was a welcoming sight.
Is this rescue from my lengthy plight?

Couldn’t escape the dungeon alone; I gave it all I had,
And then I saw His hand and for it I did grab.
Shining His light – no more gloom, no more drab.

He taught the star inside me how to shine.
I declare proudly that, “I am Thine!”
And now, my Savior is always mine!

Now I glow brightly for all to see,
Show others the Son’s light in me,
To bring them, for His Glory…

Out of the darkness and into the Light,
After the dusk, it is a welcoming sight!
Like a star in the darkness of the night!

It’s What Sunflowers Do

“Keep your face to the sunshine, and you cannot see the shadows. It’s what sunflowers do.” – Helen Keller

I admire sunflowers, for…
They spend their whole lives
Growing roots in the sod
Trying to mimic their God
With their faces to the sunrise.
Producing sun-bloom galore!

They need the Son’s rays
And Living Waters
In order to stay alive.
In order to thrive.
Yes, their Creator
They do always praise!

Focused as they grew,
Gazing not at the shadows
Or the foreboding darkness;
Only seeing their Rest
That they are to follow.
I try to do as they do!


On a different note – I bought this black-eyed Susan plant by mistake last year thinking it was a sunflower. Hey, they were both yellow. 😂 I was glad to see it was a perennial, and I planted it in the middle of the garden, hoping it would attract bees or any other pollinators. It scared me a bit when it went dormant – but it came back this year with a vengeance, and it has exploded with flowers!

(And as you can see, a bag of fertilizer and a bag of potting soil along with black-eyed Susans – I thought I had moved it out of the way before I took the photo but I guess I didn’t. 😂) Anyway, buying this plant on sale for $1.00 was a lovely mistake. 🙂

However, unlike the sunflower that points east (thanks for the sunflower facts, Peggy!), these flowers seem to point in all sorts of directions – especially up. 😄

When You Love

I’d like to thank Denny for inspiring this poem and Incomplete Thinker for inspiring me to post it, as it is a more personal poem. 🙂 Her post (that I linked to so you can read it too 😉) touched my heart so much. ❤

Love and then lose;
The bitter agony says,
It’s better to choose
To never love in any way.

Sadness is great but love is greater.
Pain from loss is a side effect of love;
Memories hurt now but will be treasured later
Recollections will last until meeting above.

When one loves, there is a chance
That the one who is given the heart
Will break it into fragments that dance
Along the floor when they shatter apart.

Father picks them up piece by piece
To soon put them together again.
“The pain will not immediately cease,
but I am here,” He says to my chagrin.

Father is near; He gives me delight
Even when all I have is despair;
He shines with His Son’s Light,
Ending the darkest night, because He cares.

He lessens the pain each day, and sleep
Alights on me nightly like a dove;
With love comes risk; if we didn’t take the leap
Of faith, would it actually be love?

 

I’m still thinking of you, Rosie. You will always be in my heart. ❤